There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
I'm always down for nudity.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
