Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
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