what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
I knew you were gonna be a good wingman when the words "dibs on the chunky one" came out of your mouth.
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
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