he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
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