What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
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