Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
