Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
Randomize
