I think scott just propositioned me for sex
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
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