I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
