Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
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