So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
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