8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
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