Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
Randomize
