I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
