Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
Randomize