There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
Randomize
