Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
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