at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Is it penis luge time yet?
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Randomize