he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
Thanks for telling my landlord that the poop stain was yours and not my secret dog.
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
