I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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