So it's 11:24am. I've had sex twice and been laid 3 times. I love holidays!
I understand the whole sex thing but did you really get laid or is that synonymous for more alcohol?????
Honestly.
Don't say a word.
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
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