There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
