oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
Randomize
