its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
