I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
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