Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
We are finally out of the honeymoon stage of the relationship because it turns out that you can't come back from peeing on me in your sleep.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
Randomize