Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
Randomize
