well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
no. you can't hotbox the world.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Randomize
