Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
Randomize
