we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
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