Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Randomize
