Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Randomize
