If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
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