dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
Randomize
