take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
