hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
Randomize