roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
Randomize
