Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
Randomize
