Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Randomize
