Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
Randomize
