She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
