What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
If I die tonight somebody's going to have to let all my tinder matches know.
Randomize
