But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
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