adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
I FOUND THE LEGS
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Randomize
