i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
Pro tip: When you spend the afternoon banging your boss, don’t meet your mother-in-law for dinner if you still smell like cum and watermelon flavored lube
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