Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
Randomize
