He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
Randomize
