just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
Randomize
