Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
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