Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
