So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
Randomize
